The tips below are combinations of sociology and psychology and christianity.
Too many families are trapped in troubles that they could have avoided if they had identified those signals. But because they could not differ, so they just took it easy.
It is not your fault if you do not know. Schools did not teach us about it. Schools forgot to teach how to maintain our family while it is the most important thing in life.
Knowing the Signals
It does not matter which problem is heading, each coming problem shares the same thing in common, friends, the wrong friends. Someone became a smoker because he has had smoker friends influenced him/her to. Jungkies has jungkies friends. A husband who has an affair out there has had friends who also commited the same who taught him to do the same thing as well. Gamblers have gambler friends. Divorced families had divorced family friends which influenced them to follow them.
While people who lead the a good life has had friends who are responsible for their families. Those good friends love their families and if someone makes friend with them, they will talk about loving their families while they are together and they also show the joy of forgiving to maintain their families. But a bad friend will show the joy of doing wrong things to their new friends, because they were also affected in the same way by his previous friends, and he tends to do the same to others to gain followers to live up the gangs.
So the first step to be aware is to watch the close friends of your husband, wife, and especially your children.
But how?
1. Be A Profilist
Be a profilist ha? Sorry to make it sounds like an FBI detective but you will apply to same method to spot lies in order to prevent mistakes. It is easy to do it. First, you need to make a standard of honesty by your family members' body language, I mean you need to memorize how when they are telling the truth. When they break the body language then you know they are lying to you. Second, you need to memorize as well your family members' routines.
To spot lies, you need to know how they are telling the truth. Do ask these yes/no questions like the following to avoid their suspicious, " Did you take your breakfast this morning?" or " Have you fed your dog?
Pay attention to their bodylanguage when they are telling the truth. Watch where their eyes goes, to the left or to the right, what about their hands and their feet movement?
Then, make them talk about why they like something, ex " Why do you really like football/fishing?" Memorize how they are explaining about something honestly.
The last, ask them about something which makes them have to think hard, like " how do you think the sound of zeraph is? Watch how they are thinking, and memorize it, you're gonna need it.
Memorize as well your family members' routines, for example if your wife never wears a make-up before leaving for groceries but changes happened and today she wears make-up before leaving for grocerries then there is something going on that you do not know, and you should find out. If your children likes to make savings but he changed into someone who always lacks of money then you should figure out what happened.
When any of your family members' friend comes over to your house or when your family is having a barbeque with friends you should make test of their body language when they are telling the truth as well. Why? Because you are going to identify who are good or bad friends for your family.
If you are suspicious about something wrong in one of your family member's friend, may be you are aware about drug using. Make a chance to talk to this person. Identify his body language when telling the truth first. And then talk about drugs this way, " I'm glad my son having a good friend like you, huff... I'm sad too many of teenagers todays involved in drugs using, and 4 of 10 users infected by Aids, " and then look at his reaction, if he seems not feeling comfortable about the topic and changes the topic, there's a great chance he is also committing the same thing. Continue with asking "how do you think if you and my son join the anti drugs campaign?" Notice how his body language changing, if contradict to the how he is saying the truth, then he is not a good friend for your son.
2. Keep Them Away from Their Bad Friends
Before everything is too late, you should keep them away from their bad friends. Sometimes a push is a must for prevention. But gentle approach is also necessary, talk in the point of view of your listener. Joining a community of good people like christiant gathering can also help to build having good friendships.
Offer also some reward for they have committed to change their bad friends to good friends.
May these tips can be a help for your family.
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